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A three-day weekend is supposed to make you tanned, rested, and ready.
However, if you waste it on silly stuff … .
Ho-ho-ho.
We all limped into work on Tuesday morning, mimicking, oddly enough, the world’s best golfers at the Charles Schwab Challenge at Colonial Country Club.
Many hobbled into the clubhouse after crossing the finish line Sunday.
Except for one guy, Sam Burns, who clearly appeared to be the only player willing to wear plaid at the post-tournament party, charging up the banks of the Trinity to conquer a very hostile Hogan’s Alley.
Burns deserved to win, shooting a 65, and defeating best pal Scottie Scheffler in a playoff with a long putt off the green on No. 18, the first playoff hole. Burns entered the final round seven shots back of Scheffler, the world’s top-ranked player who bumbled around a gusty Colonial at 2-over par. (He did, however, make some very key par saves on the back nine.)
He joined his mentor and fellow graduate of Louisiana State University David Toms as Colonial champions.
“The thing about it is it’s easy to get frustrated out there while you’re hitting good shots and the wind is giving you this, that, and the other,” Burns said. “The thing we tried to do is just conserve as much energy as possible and not waste it with silly stuff.”
Silly stuff.
Hitting a little too close to home there, Burns.
“I knew those holes and I knew the wind and I knew how challenging it was,” Burns continued. “The thing a lot of people don’t understand is putting is just as difficult. You see these guys missing these short putts, and it was like — it’s not that they’re nervous, it’s just that hard when the wind is blowing 30 mph. It’s moving those golf balls on the green.”
Scheffler seconded that motion.
“The greens,” he said with a figurative ice pack for his headache resting atop his head, “with the gusts as high as they were, it was really difficult to putt them.”
We all need to take a moment of silence for our man Harold Varner, who was in contention, at 10 under, at No. 12. A four-putt from 19 feet there sent him reeling as if he had taken a right hand from a rested-and-ready Mike Tyson.
On 13, the par-3, he hit his ball into water that protects the green the way a bear does her cubs. A double-bogey followed. On 14, he hit his drive out of bounds.
At this point, most would be considering throwing their clubs, bag and all, into the Trinity River. But Varner played on, triple-bogeying No. 14.
In three holes, Varner was 8 over. And Scheffler thought he had a headache.
This fine walk spoiled continued with a double-bogey on 17 and a bogey on 18 to close with a 78 and even-par for the tournament.
Varner was philosophical after the round.
“Crazy s--- can happen.”
Crazy, err, stuff can happen, which is why we didn't have a story on PGA Tour pro Martin Trainer's hobby of studying sitcoms. It turns out when you call Martin Trainer "Michael" he's less inclined to speak with you. Actually, he won't speak with you. It was quadruple-bogey stuff. There's always next year.
Same with Harold Varner. We assume he's coming back after his breakdown. There are some fellas out there who marry the same gal twice. No one is rooting harder for a guy to get his first PGA Tour win than I am. Go, Harold Varner.
And, you, too, Martin Trainer.
On Monday, we switched our betting interests to horse flesh. This was mere days after the office took a field trip to ride some horses at the Benbrook Stables, which had to have been a good omen, right?
No trainer has won more on this continent that Steve Asmussen, trainer par excellence. Asmussen teamed with jockey Stewart Elliott to win three stakes races, including the Steve Sexton Mile.
Silver Prospector, who made his move on Mish at midstretch and winning the $400,000 race. The 5-year-old son of Declaration of War won in 1:37.20, and he paid $13.
Asmussen also sent untested King Ottoman out to the Texas Derby. We had been warned that trainers don’t send horses out in a stakes race against quality competition unless they believe the horse can win.
The son of Curlin, the 2007 Preakness Stakes champion, got his first win and first stakes win at the same time as the fifth betting choice.
Asmussen said afterward that King Ottoman had been working with the best horses in the barn and “flashed” his ability in those workouts. That same barn had been “flabbergasted they had gotten beat in some of his maiden races,” Asmussen told Bloodhorse. “Having faith in him, and staying the course proved the right thing with him.”
Not a terrible day for your scribe here at the booth. Finished the day in the black, and that included a loss with a double premium purchase at the bar.
You know, the silly stuff.